“Humor is reason gone mad.” – Groucho Marx
“I have no advice to give to young actors. To young, struggling actresses, my advice is to keep struggling. If you struggle long enough, you will never get in trouble and if you never get into trouble, you will never be much of an actress.” – Groucho Marx
Source: The Groucho Letters: Letters from and to Groucho Marx
“Talking with one’s self is great fun because you always know what the other fellow’s comeback will be and can plan for it and without plans how can we build houses and without a house, where would our representatives be?” — Groucho Marx
Source: Mollie Merrick (1932)
“You see, what can a guy do with cigar ashes and old razor blades? True, they keep moths away but folks say an apple a day keeps a doctor away and an onion a day keeps a girl away. And which is more important to keep away – doctors, apples or moths? Why you can make applesauce from apples, onion soup from onions, while only a girl who lisps can say that a rolling stone gathers no moths. But about ashes…where shall I put them? Of course, I could put ashes to ashes and dust to dust but what have you then? Just a lot of dirt and there’s enough dirt in our lives anyway.” — Groucho Marx
Source: Mollie Merrick (1932)
“I am the most fortunate self-taught harpist and non-speaking actor who has ever lived.” – Harpo Marx
“I was the same kind of father as I was a harpist – I played by ear.” – Harpo Marx
The quote can also be found here in a nice article co-written by Harpo Marx about his family:
http://www.harpomarx.net/readersdigest.html
“Who wants to talk? I’ll tell you when I’ll talk – when they get me Garbo as my co-star.” – Harpo Marx in 1960.